Have you ever been so prepared for a negotiation and then all of a sudden, people are at each others throat, you feel yourself back against a wall and all you wonder is…what went wrong?
One of the number one mistakes when coming in to a negotiation is not that people are unprepared but that they are over prepared and locked in to their own thinking. Literally you have drank your own Kool-Aid on why you should get what you are asking for that you are blindsided when they come at you with an angle you didn’t think of.
In Vince Flynn’s book Kill Shot he writes, “The natural mistake was to get so caught up in your situation that you failed to analyze the motives, maneuvers, and talent of your opponent.”
Before building your negotiation, build your opponent’s negotiation first. This will you in three specific ways:
1. It will cause your brain to “unlock” its hold on assumptions and opinions easier so you focus on facts more.
2. It will cause you to become less emotionally tied to your side
3. It will help you build a more holistic and centered negotiation that brings clarity to the outcome you desire to achieve.
Look at an upcoming negotiation or conflict situation. Think through everything from the other person’s perspective, remaining positive about their reasons. See how it shifts what you think and how you would say things with this new insight.